It had been coming for some time….
I was feeling down, stressed and exhausted. Less fun, less smiles and more frustration and anxiety. I had very little pleasure in my work and I needed to come to terms and make some tough decisions. In December the big decision was made – I would stop working, give up my “third baby” and no later than 1st of April 2017!
As soon as the decision was made I was relieved! Finally more time to spend on myself and my familie, time to get back to basics and do the things I wanted to do for so long! Why didn’t I think of this earlier? It all seems so easy and straight-forward.
But pretty soon after that the doubts came: what about the money, what will I do now (will I ever do anything again?) There was a little devil on my shoulder whispering all the bad things that was bound to happen when making such a life-changing decision. I spend many nights with these thoughts!
But now we are almost 6 months into 2017, and no, it’s still not easy and yes, the little devil is still there;-) But basically I am happy, happier than I have been in years. I feel more connected to my husband and kids than I’ve been for a long time. At the same time I am in the process of really getting to know myself again. I am not sure what I want to do – but there’s no rush. I have some ideas, but how it will end, I don’t know.
Right now I need to keep my focus on me, my health, my family and trying to get 12 years of hard, full-time career work out of my system. The road is bumpy, and it takes me up and down, but I am confident that this was the right decision!